DIGITAL BREAKS, BREAKOUTS, AND BREAKING UP WITH FEAR

It's been 12 days since I've scrolled through Instagram or eaten a piece of bread. Can you sense my slight panic from over there?

I’m in the middle of this 30-day digital and junk food detox (you can read more here), and I’ve been getting a lot of questions about it. To sum up my observations simply: the past two weeks have been weird and hard and full of glory.

I’ve cleaned the house every day and gone to bed at about 9 PM every night because I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO. I finish work early pretty consistently because I’m not wasting my time scrolling. I’ve read 3 books already, and I’m only two weeks into this thing. I think I’ve spent more time talking to God than I have all year. I haven’t needed my inhaler once and my insomnia is basically non-existent. I am so tired of cooking already. I reach for my phone out of habit and then see the absence of Instagram and Facebook, so I frustratingly throw it down (this happens a lot).

A brief backstory/confession: when I first felt the Lord nudging me toward this detox, I thought it was a little crazy but reluctantly decided to obey. I put it on my calendar. I wrote down all of the details and shared the plans with my husband. I wondered if I should see a therapist or a doctor because this idea was slightly insane. I started buying paleo-approved groceries and praying about the process.

A day or two later, I was contacted by a few different people in the wedding industry about the dates of some of my design work. And guess what? All of the important dates were in the middle of my detox plan. (For those unfamiliar: whenever styled shoots happen in the wedding business, it is clear that contributing designers are supposed to post about the photoshoot to increase page views and networking opportunities. Basically, I could be missing out on lots of business or future collaborations if I followed through with my detox plan).

I thought through my options:

1) I could change the dates of my detox and start after the important wedding launches.

2) I could take a brief break from the detox to post about the photoshoots and then hop back off social media again.

3) Or I could keep going as scheduled and risk the consequences.

So, I was thinking about these options and leaning toward changing the dates. I hadn’t started yet, after all, and it was the smartest thing to do from a business standpoint. It felt like a good compromise.

But then I felt a gentle nudge, “Alex, do you really trust Me?”

Immediately I knew what the Lord was leading me to do, and I wasn’t super thrilled about it.

Dr. Charles Stanley preaches a beautiful challenge frequently, “Obey God and leave all the consequences to Him.” I want to live like that—no matter how difficult it is for this practical, analytical, rule-following soul of mine. Like the old hymn says, “Trust and obey, for there’s no other way…” 

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Something weird happened as Kevin and I started eating clean. About a week in, both of our faces started breaking out pretty badly. I remembered that the same thing happened when we did the Whole30 a while back, so Kevin did a bit of research. Apparently, breakouts happen to a lot of people as they start cutting out the artificial foods. It is a sign that the toxins are trying to leave the body. All of the good stuff starts pushing the bad stuff out. 

I think God is using this media fast in a similar way. He is healing places I didn’t know were bruised. He is uncovering sins I didn’t know were buried. He is calling me out upon the waters, and I am hesitantly stepping forward. He is answering all kinds of prayers that I’m usually too busy to pray about. He is revealing the importance of spiritual disciplines, and I am no longer too distracted to pay attention to Him. He is pushing out fear, worry, and bitterness and then replacing it with more trust, peace, and forgiveness. God is pushing away the bad stuff for His glory.

Don’t get me wrong: His glory doesn’t always feel like our good. I don’t want to pretend that you can just give up a few things for a limited time and life falls into place because that is not the Gospel (and that’s definitely not what is happening here). Most days have been uncomfortable and unsettled. Digging up sins is far from fun. Obeying the Spirit is almost never the easier route. I’m learning to be okay with all of this, though, because God shows up in the uncomfortable places. Awkward conversations are happening in the most beautiful, glory-filled way, and I can’t shut up about everything God is doing over here.

Friends, if you feel the Lord leading you into something, follow Him. Take the step. Make the leap. Ask the questions. Pray the prayer. Bring out the shovel and do the digging. Put your faith in Jesus, and risk the consequences.

Because there’s no doubt about it: He is a good, good, Father.

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FRUITFUL FINDS

I'm always looking for sermon, podcast, and book recommendations, so I thought it might be helpful to share a few of my favorites from the past couple of weeks with y'all as well. I plan on continuing this recommendation section in my future posts, so be on the lookout for these links if you want to add more intention to your week (and send any my way that you've been loving)!

To watch (or listen): Work and Rest (Sermon by Matt Chandler)

To read: Goliath Must Fall by Louie Giglio

To sing: The More I Seek You (Kari Jobe)

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A CHEAP, FAST FAITH.

It’s no secret that we live in a fast-paced world. We are all in a hurry and searching for a quick fix, running through drive-thrus while reading self-help books. We have all the information we need at the touch of our fingertips. We repeat the word busy over and over again— like that is what we are meant to be, like busyness qualifies us for a trophy and a few gold stars. And we, as a generation, have never been more distracted, medicated, or depressed.

We want the easy way out of everything—marriages, meals, fears, finances, faith. So we sign the divorce papers, head to the fast food restaurants, take a few pills, make a few bets, post an inspirational verse. And we still feel stressed-out, worn-down, and empty.

We eat a bag full of fried chicken and complain when we feel sick. We binge watch Friday Night Lights and then wonder why we feel distant from God. Sometimes we do these things simultaneously, which ends with rubbing a bellyache and mumbling, “Clear eyes, full bellies, can’t lose.” (I’m not saying I have, and I’m not saying I haven’t).

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Here’s the thing, friends: I’m tired of the easy route and all of the distractions and demons that come with it. The junk food has left me with acid reflux and asthma. The social media scrolling has been filling up any downtime. The constant news cycles have left me feeling overwhelmed.

The world seems to be full of screaming matches, and I can no longer hear God through all of the shouting.

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We know that Satan wants us to look around for the easy button. He wants us to be busy enough to ignore the tugs from the Spirit; he wants us to give up, succumb to fear, and head down his wide path. He wants us to buy into the world of distractions and comfort.

So what do we do when the enemy is attacking and the whole broken world seems against us? What do we do when we are riddled with anxiety and fear and arguments and spiritual warfare?

We remember Truth. And we allow Him to lead us in that hard, glorious, life-giving reconstruction. We must seek out the One voice that matters and then obey it above everything else.

This is the truth that the Lord keeps revealing to me: God did not invite us into a cheap, fast faith. He invited us to walk with Him. To wait on Him. To trust Him, step by step. To take up our crosses and follow Him. None of this comes naturally to us, of course. So we must show up in our battle gear. We must train our weak muscles. We must be ready to focus on His glory in the good and the bad and everything in-between. And while I am confident that God has already won the war, we still have some difficult earthly battles to fight.

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I don’t know exactly what a training regimen looks like for you. It will most likely involve digging into the Word and spending a lot of time in prayer...because I’ve repetitively found both of these to be necessary for rediscovering Truth and allowing Him to lead.

For me, even though there’s nothing particularly wrong, lately I’m finding myself to be more anxious than peaceful. I’m finding myself holding fast to my own plans instead of trusting that His ways are better. And I desperately need some blank space for God to show up and re-train my gaze on Himself. 

So I’m in the beginning stages of a massive 30-day detox—a physical, mental, and spiritual overhaul from all of the processed junk and lies I’ve been buying into. I’ll be turning off the news, deleting the social media apps, changing the radio station, throwing away the Cinnamon Toast Crunch (I know, I can’t even deal right now).

But I’m also adding more of the good stuff; I’ll be cooking with fresh food, studying the Word, singing worship songs, listening to what God is teaching me and writing it down. These are life-giving things for me, even though they require patience and time and (probably) tears.

This detox is not about me working my way into heaven or blaming the world for all of my problems. This is me, attempting to shove the stuff I have placed between me and God aside—so that I can see Him clearly again. I sin because I am a sinner, not because there’s a lot of sin in the world.

But just like all of the processed sugar negatively affects how I feel, the mindless scrolling and depressing news cycles and constant media bombardment have been sending me into a downward spiral. The physical and mental burdens have been running rampant, and it’s hard to see God from behind those piles of junk.

Just the other day, I was telling Kevin about my plan for this overhaul. He was quiet for a moment (which is rare) and commented, “Wow, next month is going to be really hard.”

“I think that’s the point,” I said.

No soldier ever went into a battle thinking it would be easy. And they definitely didn’t march on the battlefield without a few basic training lessons.

Put on your armor, friends. We’ve got a battle to fight.

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WANT TO JOIN?

Honestly, I hesitated in sharing this detox plan with you. I’m not trying to pat myself on the back or earn praises. In fact, it’s kind of the opposite—I am sharing in vulnerability that I need an organized plan of action so that:

-I might allow God to take the driver’s seat and start trusting that He knows the directions.

-Prayer might be a reflex instead of a last resort.

-A Jesus-flame would burn brighter and stronger.

Like I said, I also hesitated to share this with you because I don’t know what you need in your walk with God (and there is no foolproof formula even if I did). My sister can eat an entire pizza without the smallest twinge of a stomach ache (I’m jealous). I know a few strong people taking anti-anxiety medications under the watchful care of therapists and doctors, and they are better kingdom builders because of modern medicine. I have friends who juggle insane schedules and still seek the Lord first. Detoxes may look different for different people. 

But if a 30-day media & junk food break sounds like it might be a good path for you, I would love to hear from you so that we can cheer each other on throughout the month! 

THE PRACTICAL POINTS:

Food:

Kevin and I have done the Whole30 before (you can read about my experience here), but this time we are opting to eat Paleo-approved meals for 30 days straight (starting on July 6). Paleo is a little friendlier to the budget, and it is also more practical to implement after the month is over. *We are not viewing this as a diet, but as a detox.

Media:

I’m not disengaging from the world completely, but I will be cutting out Instagram and Facebook for the month. I won’t be watching the news (I’ll be reading it), and I’ll be scaling back on TV. However, I will be available through call, text, and e-mail. I’ll be showing up to life in person, and I plan to keep showing up here—if I feel led to share any of this journey through jumbled words and stories. 

Expectations:

I’m not really sure what to expect. I just know that I’ve been craving blank spaces and quiet mornings, intentionality and more time in prayer. And if I don’t give myself some guidelines to refocus, I will continue to wander around in circles while trying to do everything myself.

I’m most nervous from a business standpoint, to be honest. So many of my clients find me through social media, and I won’t be posting there for an entire month. But God is a provider, and I am attempting to release my biggest worries along with my smallest ones.

I hope to approach meals a little more slowly and methodically. I hope to make a habit of prayer as a first resort. I hope, when it’s all over, I will be refreshed from the media break and eager to engage it again with joy. I will definitely be tired of doing the dishes. 

I know God will show up, because He always does—sometimes we just need to notice Him.  

Keeping all of the disclaimers from this post in mind, we had the best time traveling abroad with our pals, the Sturdivants. It was definitely a whirlwind (we packed in A LOT of adventures) but we were able to see almost everything on our list!

This is our second year in a row to visit Europe (see posts from last year: London, Ireland, and Italy) and people always ask how we find the time/money/energy to take a week and a half adventure with friends. There are definitely some tips I can give you on ways to save money, but it really just comes down to actually doing it. Mark the calendars, book the flights, reserve the rooms, do the research, save the money, pack the bags. Traveling is hardly ever convenient, but it is always worth it. 

Okay, I am getting off my soapbox. Here are our practical travel tips:

-Travel Hacking: It sounds illegal, but it's not. Basically it's about using the right credit cards to maximize your airline miles (Thankfully, Kevin is a pro at this). If you plan far enough in advance, you can rack up enough points to pay for your flights. Resource of choice: The Points Guy

-Airbnb: We exclusively use airbnb when traveling and have only had one bad experience. Not only are the prices way better than hotels, but you also feel more immersed in the culture and receive insider tips on the city from your host! When booking, make sure you reserve the entire place (not just a room) and try to book with the Super Hosts for the best quality experience.

-Travel during the off-season (if you can): shorter lines and lower prices? Yes, please. 

-Do the research: I'm not going to lie-- this takes time. But if you do the research in advance, you can find the best ticket prices/transportation rates/places to stay AND you can maximize your time when you are actually there. We had a google doc of our trip itinerary, and I can't tell you how many times we needed it throughout the trip. 

-Pack light: Pack everything in a carry-on. When jumping in and out of cities and parking far away from your hotel/Airbnb- you do not want to be carrying large suitcases (nor will you be able to fit everything in your rental car). We all packed carry-ons and were so glad we did! 

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Since this may be the longest post in the history of posts, here is a short summary of each city we visited if you don't have time to read my ridiculous novel below.

Madrid is a fun, busy city with lots of culture and flower shops and the most beautiful park. 

Córdoba has bucketfuls of charm, quirky bachelorette parties (?), flower-lined patios, and color at every turn. 

Granada is full of little white houses stacked on one another, bands of Spanish hippies, fascinating histories, and charming narrow streets. 

Málaga is very clean, a little ritzy, has lots of fresh seafood and is not your typical beach town. It's easy to become a believer of the city after just one visit. 

Ronda is adorable and enchanting and has the most stunning scenery. If I could only go back to one place from the trip, it would be Ronda. 

Seville is a big city with loads of tradition and beautiful architecture and endless activities. This city has plenty of opportunities for adventures at bull fights, soccer games, and historic landmarks. 

Lisbon has the prettiest tiled buildings, rows of red rooftops, and is delightfully similar to San Francisco. Whenever we told people we were going to Lisbon, they would respond "Aww, Lisbon!" and now we know why everyone falls in love with this unique city.

Keep reading for photos and details of our trip (sections divided by each city)...

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PART ONE: Madrid 

We landed in Madrid, grabbed coffee and croissants, and hit the ground running! Luckily you can basically walk anywhere in Madrid, so we wandered through Plaza Major and Puerta del Sol and made our way to Mercado de San Miguel. The market was filled with rows of various stands carrying fresh food and drinks and ice cream; we all loved the market and ate some of the best paella (a rice dish typically with chicken or seafood) of the whole trip from a little stand right inside. Our next stop was the Royal Palace of Madrid and the gardens, which were both beautiful. Brittany and I took lots of pictures while the boys goofed off (typical), then we headed back to the airbnb for an afternoon siesta. With our second wave of energy, we walked to Retiro Park and enjoyed our first (of many) churros con chocolate. Y'all, they do not mess around with the giant cup of chocolate. Apparently the locals actually drink the chocolate straight out of the cup after they finish with the churros. I am forever amazed and impressed by this one fact alone. 

Retiro Park was stunning (especially at sunset) and probably my favorite stop in all of Madrid. We tried to check out the Prado that evening since the last hour is free, but the lines were ridiculously long so we ended up paying the entrance fee the next day. We had been told to make this art museum a priority, and I'm so glad we did! We all remembered learning about some of the more famous paintings and loved looking through the different artists' works. After the Prado, we met up with Robert and Brittney's friend (who lives in Madrid) and she showed us an awesome rooftop view of the city at Círculo de Bellas Artes, then we grabbed more churros & chocolate at Chocolatería San Ginés and wandered into El Viajero for dinner (If you can't tell, we ate. A LOT.)  

To Do: Plaza Major, Puerta de Sol, Royal Palace of Madrid (& gardens), Retiro Park, Museo Nacional Del Prado, Círculo de Bella's Artes (rooftop views)

To Eat: La Rollerie (brunch), Chocolatería San Ginés (churros), Mercado de San Miguel (snacks), Taberna La Concha (tapas), El Viajero (dinner on the roof)

To Stay: Click here for Airbnb listing. 

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PART TWO: Córdoba

We woke up early and took the train to Córdoba, the most charming and colorful town we visited. After picking up our rental car and stopping for toast and coffee, we headed to the Alcázar de los Reyes Cristianos and wandered around the beautiful gardens. It was easy to fall in love with Córdoba right away, especially after we walked through La Judería (the city's oldest Jewish neighborhood)-- each street was lined with colorful flower pots and filled with admirers of the city. We were also able to see the iconic architecture of the Mezquita, which brought back lots of memories from high school Spanish history lessons. Unfortunately we were only in the city for one night, so we took the rest of the day slowly (in true Spanish fashion) and tried to soak up the charm as much as possible!

To Do: Alcázar de los Reyes Cristianos, Patios de Córdoba (La Judería had the best patios we saw), Mezquita Cathedral de Córdoba

To Eat: Roma MMXVI (breakfast), restaurant in La Judería (lunch), Restaurante La Tagliatella (dinner), Café & Té (breakfast)

To Stay: Click here for Airbnb listing. 

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PART THREE: Granada

To be honest, Granada and this team of travelers did not get off to a great start. Let's just say this is not necessarily the city you want to drive a rental car through (see the photo where Kevin is stretching out his arms? We may or may not have gotten stuck in that alleyway and we may or may not have gotten a standing ovation from a gathering crowd of people when we finally made it through...) We also quickly found out that tickets to the Alhambra were sold out and needed to be purchased months in advance (we had no clue), so we frantically searched tour shops for guided tour tickets instead. We got super lucky and found the last four guided tour tickets of the Alhambra for early Tuesday morning (our last day in Granada), then celebrated with ice cream and dinner at a pretty viewpoint called Mirador San Nicolás. 

We didn't really have anything planned for Monday since we set aside that day for the Alhambra, so we had time to explore at a slower pace. We saw the incredible cathedral, the bath houses, and stopped frequently for food (of course). We stumbled upon a hole-in-the-wall pizza place that was extra delicious, and that night we went to Jardines de Zoraya for dinner and a flamenco show. Flamenco is the traditional Spanish dancing and a must-see when in Spain! The next morning we left for the Alhambra bright and early. There is a lot of hype around this castle and for good reason; the Alhambra definitely rivals the Vatican in having the most impressive rooms I've ever seen. We were also really glad we got the guided tour tickets-- we were able to hear more of the Alhambra's history and the tales about the people who inhabited the palaces. If you visit the Alhambra, don't skip over the GeneraLife Gardens. They are amazing and worth the extra euros. We definitely left Granada on a much better foot than when we started!

To Do: Paseo de los Tristes, Mirador San Nicolás (great views), Catedral de Granada, El Bañuelo, Dobla de Oro, Jardines de Zoraya (flamenco show), Alhambra (Both palaces & GeneraLife Gardens) 

Tips on visiting the Alhambra: If you don't have time to buy tickets before you get to Granada, go to Granada City Experience (in the City Center) for guided tour tickets- they don't sell tickets online so they are your best bet for getting them in person. The Alhambra ticket offices do reserve some tickets for same-day sales, but people start lining up for those as early as THREE (!!!) o'clock in the morning. You can walk to the Alhambra from the city, but I recommend getting a taxi- it is a pretty steep walk up the hill and you will do a ton of walking once you are inside. After getting your ticket, you will need to hang onto it because you have to show it at all of the palace entrances and the entrance to the gardens. 

To Eat: Restaurants outside on Paseo de los Tristes (there are about 5 in a row that all serve similar food and have a great atmosphere), Helados San Nicolas (ice cream), Ristorante El Balcón de San Nicolás (dinner), Cafetería Lisboa (brunch), Bar Miguel Bajo (lunch/pizza), Jardines de Zoraya (tapas/dinner)

To Stay: Albaicín neighborhood

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PART FOUR: Málaga & Ronda

We drove to Málaga and immediately realized that it was a much bigger, busier city than we expected (we felt this way almost everywhere we went). Our Airbnb host spoke great English and was super helpful; he walked us around the city and took us to a (VERY) fresh seafood market. Then we headed to a delicious ice cream shop before making our way to the beach. The walk along the water was beautiful, so we strolled slowly and stopped to take in the unique & modern architecture. That night we headed to a cool spot for rooftop views of the city to watch the sunset and then walked to a restaurant our host recommended called El Pimpi for tapas and dessert. 

We left the next morning to drive to Seville, but made a stop at a cute and crazy-beautiful town called Ronda. Ronda is one of the many pueblos blancos (little white towns) which are scattered throughout Spain. We were only able to stay a couple of hours, so we explored the amazing views at the Puente Nuevo Bridge quickly and walked through several of the darling streets. We all wished we had more time in Ronda and Málaga, but we were also excited because we had lots of fun plans in Seville!

To Do (Málaga): Beach & walk along the water, La Terrazzo de la Alcazaba (rooftop views), shopping in the city

To Eat (Málaga): Mercado Central de Atarazanas (fresh seafood market), El Pimpi (dinner), Casa Mira (ice cream), Café Central (breakfast)

To Stay (Málaga): Click here for Airbnb listing. 

To Do (Ronda): Puente Nuevo bridge & viewpoints at surrounding parks

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PART FIVE: Seville

Arriving in Seville right on time, we stopped and bought tickets for that night's bull fight and then headed to our Airbnb, where we had an amazing rooftop all to ourselves. After enjoying more ice cream at Helados Rayas, we stopped in a few of the hat shops and then walked to the bull ring. Brittany and I were very skeptical about watching the bull fight, but the boys were ready/excited. I may have closed my eyes most of the fight (the poor bulls!), but it was still interesting to see how all of the locals dress up for the event and cheer for the different moves made by the matadors. That night we ate an amazing tapas dinner at Casa Morales and headed back to our little rooftop to take in the views of the city at night. 

The next morning we woke up early and waited in the long lines for the Alcazar, which was insanely gorgeous at every turn. We could've spent all day wandering through the buildings and gardens, but instead walked to the Cathedral de Sevilla. We saw the tomb of Christopher Columbus and made the trek to the top of the clock tower for more beautiful views of the city. After the cathedral, we stopped at Bar Alfalfa to refuel on tapas and paella. Kevin was adamant about renting a bike, so we walked to a little bike rental shop after lunch so he could explore the city on wheels for a little while. We had tickets for the Sevilla FC game that night, so we checked off the rest of the sites on our list: Metropol Parasol (aka the mushrooms) and Plaza de España. Unfortunately it started to rain, so we had a little trouble catching a cab to the game (they don't have Uber in Seville) but thankfully our seats were under the only covered section in the stadium! The game was one of the best experiences of the whole trip; we loved the atmosphere, chants, and cheering on the win of the home team. We were all singing the Seville cheer (however poorly) the rest of the night while we walked along the Triana bridge and ate more tapas. 

Our last morning in Seville we did a lot of walking in the rain, but it was worth it because we lucked out on a table at Bar El Comercio and kicked off Brittany's birthday with the most delicious breakfast churros and café con leche before dropping off our rental car and flying to Lisbon for our last full day!

To Do: Plaza de toros de la Real Maestranza de Caballería de Sevilla (Bull fight), The Real Alcazar, Cathedral de Sevilla, Plaza de España, Metropol Parasol, Ramon Sanchez-Pizjuan Stadium (soccer game), Triana Bridge 

To Eat: Helados Rayas (ice cream), Casa Morales (dinner/tapas), Bar Alfalfa (lunch/paella), Bar El Comercio (breakfast/churros)

To Stay: Click here for Airbnb listing.

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PART SIX: Lisbon, Portugal

Last but definitely not least: Lisbon greeted us with lots of sunshine and a friendly Uber driver, who told us all of the best places to see in our short time there. We dropped off our bags at our cute little blue & white apartment and immediately started exploring. We were constantly "oohing" and "ahhing" over the buildings covered in colorful tiles while we walked through the Chiado district and toasted Brittany's birthday with gelato at Santini. Then we wandered to Miradouro de Santa Catarina for a pretty view over the city while the sun set. We all immediately recognized the city's many similarities to San Francisco with the pastel buildings, trolley system, and look-a-like bridge. For dinner, we explored and ate yummy food at Time Out Market. Chefs from all over the city contribute to the different restaurants and we all loved the different meals we had there.  

The next morning we had a big breakfast and tried some of Portugal's famous pastries (pastel de nata) before making the steep hike to Castel de S. Jorge. Right off the bat, the castle greets you with the best views of the city and lots of bold peacocks. Although we were pretty exhausted at this point in the trip, we still loved seeing all of the views from the castle and ended up returning to the shops beside the castle for the prettiest hand-painted blue and white pottery. After the castle, we walked through the huge outdoor flea market, Feira da Ladra (only open on Saturdays). It was so fun to look through all of the stands, and I even scored some vintage Portuguese stamps. After successfully wandering through the market, we had a long and leisurely lunch at Barrio Avillez and then pastries and coffee at Confeitaria Nacional, which were both delicious. All of us were pretty low on euros since it was our last day, but we combined our remaining dollars for a short ride through the city in a Tok-Tok (kind of like big golf carts). Then we grabbed our bags and flew back to Madrid late that night before our long flight home the next morning! We left behind Portugal and Spain feeling exhausted, accomplished, and full of churros. 

To Do: Miradouro de Santa Catarina (there are lots of viewpoints throughout Lisbon), Castel de S. Jorge, Feira de Ladra, Chiado neighborhood, Bairro Alto neighborhood, ride on Tok-Tok

To Eat: Santini (gelato), Time Out Market (dinner), Augusto's (breakfast), Barrio Avillez (lunch/one of our favorite meals from the trip!), Confeitaria Nacional (pastries/coffee)

To Stay: Click here for Airbnb listing. 

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THINGS WE LEARNED

Language: There aren't many English speakers in Southern Spain, but almost everyone speaks English in Lisbon, Portugal. We were very thankful that all of us had taken some Spanish classes in the past. *I'm not naming names (cough: boys), but speaking louder and slower English is not helpful when communicating with a non-English speaker. Over-dramatic hand gestures ARE helpful when communicating.

Food: Two words: churros & chocolate. Eat whenever available. Other foods to try: papas bravas, paella, croquettes, all. the. tapas. 

Dining: Prepare to dine very slowly in Spain. No one is in a hurry and the waiters will never bring you a bill without being asked. To receive the check, you must get their attention and ask for it (la cuenta). Restaurants will almost always put bread on the table without asking, but they will also (almost) always charge you for it. Europe doesn't really do American coffee- the closest you can get is an americano (basically watered down espresso), but I usually opted for café con leche (latte). 

Driving: Just because you see a van go down a very narrow road does not mean you should follow them. Sometimes "roads" are more like alleys. You may also be charged for a speeding ticket via traffic cam for going 10 km (= 6 miles) over the speed limit in the middle of nowhere. When in doubt, drive slowly. 

Random: Spanish soccer chants are catchy. Bull fights are gory. Comfortable shoes are necessary. Dealing with OCD Airbnb hosts will end badly. Rooftops are always a good idea. 

It’s easy to idealize traveling. We see someone’s photos in a place halfway across the world and think everything is perfect abroad. We create cute Pinterest boards called Wanderlust and pass it off as harmless.

I know this because I’ve been there. So I’m going to do things a little differently by giving you a few deglamorized disclaimers and thoughts about traveling based on our most recent trip abroad.

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Here’s the truth about traveling: not everything goes smoothly and it is far from perfect. 

You make a few wrong turns and end up in an alley too small for your rental car, or heading the wrong direction on a one-way street. You have to re-route often with a few too many U-turns. You end up running across highways or through airports because your timing is a little off. An angry taxi driver may yell Spanish phrases at you for no apparent reason; there are a lot of failed communications and misunderstandings. No matter how detailed your lists are, the planning goes awry and you collapse on a bench, exhausted and confused.

When it comes down to it—traveling is a lot like everyday life, I suppose. You have to keep showing up in faith and putting one foot in front of the other. You may not always end up where you thought you’d be, but you usually end up where you’re supposed to be. You will recognize that no journey is too difficult if you are surrounded by the right people. You will fail, but you will also tuck a few more lessons into your back pocket than you expected. You will laugh a lot.

You might realize that no matter how different the whole bustling world is, our slightly-broken hearts often beat for the same beautiful dreams. You will climb steep steps and green mountains; God is there, ready to meet you in all of it. The best views may not come until you reach the top, but the best stories usually come from the climb.  

And in the end, when it's all said and done-- you are mostly just eager to be welcomed home. 

I want to write to all of you quiet heroes today. I want to tell you how much your life matters and how infinitely loved you are.

You are taking up crosses. Laying down selfishness. Pushing back darkness. Showing up day after day when all you want to do is sit and yell at God for a while. You are remaining faithful to the Lord’s calling in the face of uncertainty. You are grasping grace and then giving it away. 

And your life may feel unnoticed. It may feel unappreciated and mundane. You may not be getting the affirmation or praise you desire to keep on going. You are punching the time clocks, changing the diapers, saying the prayers, taking the notes, folding the laundry. Then you are doing it all over again and again and again.

But you, quiet hero, are inspiring. Your faithfulness in the everyday is important. Don’t ever let someone convince you otherwise.

Because (I’m going to let you in on an encouraging word) …

When an ordinary life is marked by extraordinary grace, it isn’t so ordinary anymore.

So stand up, shake the dust, and keep on going. There is glory in the grittiness. 

We rarely know what God is working on behind the scenes. We don’t know what He might do through a little faith and a brave leap. A gentle word could change someone’s day. A love-filled conversation could change someone’s life.

And I can tell you this, at the very least:

When I look over at you—smiling at the customers, raising the kids, earning the degree, cooking for the loved ones, making the art—I know that God will give me the strength to keep going, too.

You are a glimpse of the real Hero, dear one.

Your faithfulness is far louder than you think. 

And your light shines far brighter than you know. 

Photo by Love Be Photography

Comparison is a tricky thing, isn’t it?

Gosh, I’ve been there. I tracked the numbers, stacked up the dominoes, drank the Kool-Aid, did the dance. I tidied the corners of my rooms. I tried tidying the corners of my heart. I brought out the yardstick; do I measure up yet? Will I ever?

Let me spoil things for you: the numbers are never enough, the dominoes fall over, the Kool-Aid makes me sick, I break a leg doing the dance. Those corners multiply cobwebs and the yardstick keeps growing taller. I am too much. I am not enough.

She is way more talented than me; she probably never ruins dinner or spills the coffee or burns the toast. He has it all together; he has two kids and runs a successful business and bought a new house. Why can’t I handle my own one life? Why do the dominoes keep falling over?

I don’t take up enough space in this great big, messy world. I am twenty-five and a little too introspective. I feel the weight of a generation who gave up on God, and I can’t seem to do anything about it. The yardstick keeps growing. I keep shrinking.

I hear the tick, tick, tick of an ever-moving clock.

Did you know the clock was a bomb all along?

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None of us wanted comparison, of course. We never wanted to carry these things around like plastic bags of groceries. We wanted connection and inspiration and authenticity. But comparison shows up uninvited and takes its seat right next to us. And instead of kicking it out of the house, we settle in and say, “Could you pass the popcorn, dear?”

Tick, tick, tick.

I think I can hear the bombs in the distance. Sounds like they’re getting closer.

The explosion usually happens, of course. We slam the doors, shatter the china, cry the tears. There will always be someone better, prettier, more put-together. We feel defeated and host an exclusive pity-party in our honor. We make a mental burn book about our supposed friends who don’t show up, Regina George style.

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There has to be a better way.

Let me tell you, friends: there is a better way.

We can try to keep up with everyone else in the rat race and the striving for more. Or.

We can believe that we are enough, right where we are.

Not because of our accomplishments. Not because of our beauty. Not because of our golden hearts.

These things are all variables, messy and often failing. The grass withers, the flower fades.

But.

God.

But God—this is my favorite phrase in the whole broken world.

We are not enough on our own selfish paths, but God is enough. He has paid the price, shed the tears, dripped the blood. And if we choose to believe this crazy-good Gospel Story—if we confess with our mouths that Jesus is Lord, if we believe in our hearts that God raised Him from the dead—we will be saved from ourselves. Because He is enough.

We are broken. But God is whole.

We are sinners. But God is perfect.

We are constantly changing. But God is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

We hear the ticking of a bomb and brace for the explosion. But God is a shelter.

We are headed down a doom-filled path. But God steps in and says, “I’ve got this.”

I guess what I’m trying to say is this: We can compare ourselves constantly, we can try to measure up, we can do the good deeds for affirmations and accolades, but we will continue striving—forever and ever, amen.

And I have said this before, but I will say it again and again and again: Jesus is the only comfort and contentment I find to be unfailing. The more I look to myself or the world for fulfillment, the more I am left grasping at straws. But the more I look to God, the more I realize His faithfulness, His grace, His enough-ness for the both of us. For all of us.

It turns out I was measuring with the wrong yardstick all along. I should’ve been counting His endless mercies. I should’ve been writing down all of the ways He is love. This is a far superior way to spend my days.

And these relationships with other broken humans? They aren’t meant to be stacked up and measured. They were never meant to identify self-worth. But God did intend our relationships to point to the Gospel. In marriage and raising families and reporting to our bosses—we are learning sacrifice. We are learning love. Earthly relationships may be messy, but they can also act as beacons of grace and forgiveness, mercy and obedience.

We have the opportunity to shine our lights to each other and point the way home. Sure, we can lament about how narrow the path is and how easy it is to stumble. But when we see our neighbor wander a little off course, we will lean over and shout, "We are enough-- because He is!"

There is room for grace in our relationships, friends. And God is there, ready to pour out His grace in all of those small-big moments.

We are enough. Because He is. 

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